The mom effect? Why households fall apart fast without her

How long would the typical family last without a mom to run the show? Less than a day, according to the data.

A recent survey in honor of Mother’s Day polled 2,000 moms, spotlighting their many roles and contributions to the family and found that more than half (58%) said that things would crash and burn without them in a day or less.

The study was commissioned by It’s a Family Thing! by S’moresUp (https://itsafamilything.com/mothersday2026) and conducted by Talker Research and confirmed that moms really do steer the family through day-to-day life. Looking at the roles they most identify with, the findings confirmed that they do it all just to keep things running smoothly.

Exploring the job titles that reflect their contributions to their families, the title that resonated the most with the mothers polled was “cleaner” (66%), followed by “chef” (57%). Other most common titles were “guidance counselor” (47%), “event planner” (43%) and “chauffeur” (43%), all showcasing their tireless efforts.

“When over half of moms say their families wouldn’t be able to function for even a day without them, it really shows how much invisible work is going on in the home,” said Priya Rajendran, co-founder of It’s A Family Thing. “A big part of what mom does is also remembering, reminding and following up to make sure everything keeps moving but this is never really talked about.”

Interestingly, the titles that moms most popularly identified with reflect more of a support staff role than a leadership role in the family.

Only 27% of moms labeled themselves as the “chief executive officers” of their families, shining a light on that, while moms are more than qualified to lead front and center, many end up filling more of a behind-the-scenes position in family life.

“The burden is on the mom to remember, follow through, remind the family and keep everything on track and the household working properly,” added Reeves Xavier, co-founder of It’s a Family Thing. “The overwhelm is not the actual tasks or the amount of work, it’s in everything that comes next.”

The cost of mothers juggling so many roles adds up and takes a toll. Per the results, moms are only getting six hours of sleep, on average, during a typical night. And a large number (42%) said it’s been more than a few weeks since they’ve gotten a really good night’s sleep.

Nearly half of moms (49%) said they remind family members about tasks, schedules or responsibilities, and 41% said they repeat instructions or follow up to make sure things get done.

The survey also showed that moms feel like they’re in “survival mode” nearly half the time (46%), and nearly one in five mothers (18%) have never had a day all to themselves, or can’t remember the last time they had one.

Additionally, 44% of the mothers surveyed have jobs, which adds an additional layer of business and stress. Most moms with full-time jobs (68%) admitted that burnout from the business of family life has a negative impact on their work quality, and on the flip side, the majority (66%) also confessed that fatigue from work detracts from their family life and commitments.

In honor of Mother’s Day, and to take a bit of the work off their plates, the survey asked moms what things they’d like to receive in place of physical gifts. Their top answer was hiring a professional cleaner (36%). A third (33%) also said they’d love a spa day and 28% would simply enjoy a week without cooking duties.

JOB DUTIES THAT MOMS CONSTANTLY PERFORM

1. Cleaner (66%)
2. Chef (57%)
3. Guidance counselor (47%)
4. Event planner (43%)
5. Chauffeur (43%)
6. Professor/teacher (40%)
7. Chief financial officer (37%)
8. Secretary (37%)
9. Chief operating officer (33%)
10. Chief executive officer (27%)